Where We’re At

Currently we are in a sort of limbo. IFs have a phone consultation with the RE on Wednesday (it was originally last week, but the doctor had to reschedule). After that they will decide if they want to go through the process to make more embryos or not.

We had a great video chat the week after we got the negative beta results. It was nice to see them and their daughter. They were very sweet and wanted to make sure that I knew they didn’t blame me at all for it not working. They also wanted me to know that if they decide not to make more embryos it doesn’t have anything to do with me or them not wanting to move forward with me.

I told them to take as much time as they needed to make the decision as I wasn’t in a hurry. They are fairly quick decision makers though so I think they’ll have an answer relatively quickly after their consultation.

I would be absolutely ecstatic if they decided to make more embryos, but I have the gut feeling they’re maybe leaning towards not. That may just be me projecting my feelings that it would be such a process (if I were in their shoes, not a process for me personally). I don’t know. I messaged them later and let them know that as much as I would love it if they made new embryos I don’t want them to feel at all guilty if they decide not to. It’s a daunting process and I would 100% understand if they decided it wasn’t right for their family. Either way I’m very glad that the universe brought us all together to bring their daughter into the world.

As far as post failed transfer me stuff, I’ve been doing good. I do keep thinking things like “oh I should be 6 weeks now” or “we should have an ultrasound coming up this week”. It makes me disappointed again that the transfer didn’t work. I know enough to only have cautiously planned to be pregnant until September, but it was still always in the back of my mind how far along I might be during different things between not and September. Now knowing that it’s not going to be that way is a bummer.

That’s all the updates I have for now. I will update at least one more time after IFs decide which direction is best for them, after that we shall see 🙂

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