Evals & Delays

The husband and I had our first psych eval last Wednesday. The psychologist was running a few minutes behind so we were just sitting at the computer waiting. My phone started ringing with a Las Vegas number that I knew was the fertility clinic that I had been emailing with all that day. I didn’t want to miss the fertility clinic call because I had been waiting for over a week to hear from them. I picked it up and as I said hello, Skype started ringing. I went into the kitchen to talk to the fertility clinic and my husband answered Skype.

Here’s the update regarding the fertility clinic: They will only see me on CD 12-14 which this cycle will be when I’m off the grid in Eastern Oregon on a camping trip. We were hoping to get this taken care of before I left, but unfortunately it won’t be possible. After talking to Lesleigh (My clinic contact) she said that I should continue my BCPs (birth control pills) as normal, but instead of taking the active ones for another three weeks I’ll take them for two so we can cut some time off of the wait. Even at that it’s going to be about a month before I can get me medical screening done. I’m definitely bummed. I want to get this process moving for my IFs sake. They’ve waited so long to be able to do this and any delays are just making them wait even longer. That being said I know that delays and the unexpected are the name of the surrogacy game and there’s nothing to be done except go with the flow. At least I know that the next 3 weeks will go pretty quick with preparations for camping and the trip itself. Fingers crossed my body does what it’s supposed to and CD1 shows up when it should. (As a heads up to readers..I don’t plan on leaving out gory details so if talking about cycles, periods, vaginal ultrasounds, OB/GYN appointments makes you uncomfortable this probably isn’t the blog for you LOL)

So back to the psych eval…we finally connected and the evaluation began. Andrea was sitting with a large window behind her which made it so we couldn’t see her face, so we still have no idea what she looks like 😛 She asked me a bunch of questions about my childhood, why I want to be a surrogate, we went over again how many embryos we’ll be transferring (just 1!) if it splits am I willing to carry twins or triplets (yes), what kind of relationship am I expecting after the baby is born, and a slew of others. She asked AJ a handful of questions about our relationship and we were done. She had told us it would take about an hour, we finished in 15 min, just call us over achievers LOL Part of that was due to the fact that the connection wasn’t the best so we each kept cutting out which was wasn’t conducive to any extended conversations. After asking if it was possible for AJ to skip the joint session because it’s hard for him to miss work (he can’t skip it so it is what it is) we said our goodbyes. Andrea had asked that we send her some times we’re available this week because she’s leaving the country next week for a couple weeks and wants this done before she leaves (so do we!). AJ and I talked for a few minutes about what times would work the best. We have to have it on a day where we can take the kids to daycare and at a time that meshes with the 8 hour time difference between us and B & R. We settled on a few days/times and emailed them to Andrea.

Fast forward to today and I still hadn’t heard anything about a time this week. I decided to once again be proactive (this seems to be a good skill in the surrogacy game when wanting to stay in the loop or get things moving) and I emailed Andrea this morning to see if there was an update on an appointment time. She quickly emailed me, B, and R saying that she had a name mix up and thought we were already scheduled. She let them know the times we are available and asked if either of those days/times worked for B & R. B wrote back quickly after and said that they could do Thursday morning. So we’re all set for our joint session Thursday morning. It’ll be an early morning for our kids, but they’ll survive even if they’ll likely end up cranky by the time I pick them up that evening 🙂

Somewhere in there I messaged K (our case manager at our agency) and let her know about the delay with the medical screening as well as having completed our first session with Andrea. I told her that I didn’t know for sure, but I think we did okay. She emailed me back and said that we did in fact pass the evaluation, not that I was concerned, but it’s good to know for sure.

That’s where we’re at right now. I’m really looking forward to talking to B & R again and for AJ to “meet” them. He’s not as emotionally invested in this process obviously, but I think he’ll really like them and see himself in R a bit. They’re both soft spoken, quiet, and let their spouse do most of the talking.

Happy Monday!


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