This past Saturday, Sept. 11th, surro babe #1 turned 3 years old!! It seems like yesterday and forever ago that I was in the hospital getting her into her dads’ arms. She’s so cute and I love seeing the pictures they send me. It’s been so fun watching her grow! I’m so happy that her dads have kept in touch over the years. I would love to be able to go and visit them in England someday. Hopefully we can make that happen some time in the future.
Yesterday our agency coordinator was back in the office and was able to get my flights booked for the med screening appointment in October. Unfortunately, due to COVID the airline that flies from our little airport to PDX has cut down their flights. There used to be several direct flights all day long to and from PDX. Now there is one in the morning and one in the evening. This means I arrive in Portland at 7:45am, have my appointment at 1pm, and don’t fly out until 9:20pm. This means I will leave before my kids wake up and be home after they’re asleep. It’s a bummer, but that’s the times we in and it’s just one day. I could drive there, but I loathe driving in Portland, plus trying to find parking and having to drive 8 hours in one day…I’ll just take my early/late flights instead.
Right now it seems like October 25th is so far away, but it’ll be here before I know it. The kids are back in school now, soccer practices start tomorrow, soccer games start on the 18th and are every weekend until 10/30 so we’ll be busy.
I’ve been getting a little burnt out at work covering maternity leave for a coworker since the beginning of June and she comes back next week. This will let me reduce my hours and the amount of days I have to be in the office. I’m really looking forward to having less time in the office and getting my super flexible schedule back. We had an absolutely wonderful summer. I mean we seriously killed it and the kids got to do so many fun things it’s ridiculous. I love summer and everything it brings (minus the wildfire smoke), but it’s exhausting. We have no routine, bed time is whenever it happens, I’m constantly packing or unpacking the trailer, and we’re away from home a lot. I love it all, but I’m ready to settle back into our non summer routine. Earlier bed times mean I actually get time to myself in the evenings. I get to relax and get some exercise in without feeling guilty about not doing something with the kids. I love seeing the kids enjoy school and learning new things. I love watching them play soccer and having fun getting some exercise in. I like being home on the weekends without a bunch of big projects to do like in the Spring.
All in all good things are happening here despite a raging pandemic and living in a country where people don’t give a crap about anyone but themselves. Cheers!
We actually have some forward movement! Woohoo! I knew when we started this process early knowing we wouldn’t be transferring until late this year or early next year that there would be long periods of waiting. However, I thought the waiting would come after we got the screening and contracts done, not before. It’s not a big deal, but I was just expecting to be able to move forward until those things were done then wait. So now it’s nice to be making some progress.
I got an email from our agency coordinator a week ago asking to confirm some information so they can start working on contracts. She also asked that I reach out to the lawyer of my choice to see if they’re available to represent me. I got back to her quickly then emailed my lawyer to make sure she was able to represent me. I got a reply from her later that afternoon saying that she was “delighted” to hear from me and would be happy to represent me again. So all that stuff is squared away. Our agency coordinator got my lawyer the information she needed and I haven’t heard anything more yet.
I did eventually hear from the coordinator at the fertility clinic about scheduling the medical screening. It took some back and forth, but we got it scheduled for Monday October 25 at 1pm. I’m planning on flying into Portland that morning and then home that afternoon/evening. Right now the only flights that would work with timing is one that leaves here at 7am (arrives 7:47am) and a flight back that leaves at 9:15pm and arrives back home at 10pm. Neither of those are ideal and will make for a long day, but it’s totally doable and I will make it work. I don’t mind hanging out at PDX. It’s a nice airport, good restaurants, and I know where they keep the comfy chairs LOL
I’m glad we’re having some forward movement. Hopefully we can keep moving forward. I just got an email a few minutes ago that our agency coordinator is out of the office until Friday dealing with an unexpected family emergency so I don’t expect to hear anymore until at least then, but I’m sure it’ll be next week instead.
In family news our kiddos are currently camping with my parents and having a blast I’m sure. They come home Thursday and Friday we leave to go camping for the long weekend. We get home Monday, they have Tuesday off then start school on Wednesday. Soccer practices start for both of them on Thursday. It’s a whirlwind last week and a half of summer for them.
Hopefully I’ll have another productive update next week!
Not much to update on regarding surrogacy or anything else for that matter LOL
I did end up emailing our clinic coordinators about getting an appointment on the books in October, but haven’t heard back from them. Through an email exchange with a different person regarding login info for their patient portal I found out that our supporting coordinator (we have a main coordinator and a supporting coordinator) is out on leave this month and should be back in Sept. Our main coordinator is working though so hopefully she will get back to me soon.
Other than that I’m just hanging out. I haven’t heard anymore about being able to start contracts. Our agency coordinator said they should be started in August or September and we’re just over halfway through August so lots of time there.
We’re still in summer mode so I’m pretty chill about the waiting. Come September when we go back to our regular routine (at least the one we have 9.5 months out of the year) I think I will be more anxious to get the ball rolling.
It’s been over a month since my last post for a couple reasons. First, there hasn’t been anything to update on regarding the surrogacy stuff. Second we have been busy and were out of town for two weeks, just getting back a few days ago.
I still don’t have any new news regarding the surrogacy stuff. We’re still just waiting for it to be time to start the contract and schedule the medical clearance. I’m toying with the idea of reaching out to the clinic to see if we can just go ahead and schedule the clearance since I’m on birth control and can make my cycle days line up to whatever they need them to be for the appointment (I think they want it done between CD6-CD10). Then at least the flights could be booked and maybe it will be less expensive to book them further ahead of time. I will probably inquire about it in the next couple days.
Aside from waiting on the next steps in the surrogacy process, we have been having a great summer! We spend 5 nights camping with my husband’s side of the family which included fishing, boating, games, a trip to a water park, and lots of laughing and family time. Our kids really enjoyed themselves as there were lots of kids/cousins around their age there.
From there we headed down the Oregon Coast to Brookings, OR for the next 8 nights. We thoroughly enjoyed our time there as well. We found so many fun things to do. The campground we stayed in was within walking distance to tidepools and the beach. Brookings has an amazing park that we went to and stumbled upon a free outdoor concert which was so fun. Wyatt and I went on a jet boat up the Rogue River. We went swimming and gold panning on the Smith River. We visited Ocean World and got to pet a leopard shark. We found good seafood and some fun disc golf courses. We can home with our hearts full of appreciation for the time we were able to spend with both sides of our family.
This month will be busy as well. This week is our only “slow” week. Next week the kids go to their grandparents’ house to go to the county fair there. The next week we have friends coming into town to decide if they want to move here. We’re planning on showing them around a bit, especially the family friendly stuff we have here as they have young kids. The next week the kids are camping with their grandparents not too far from our house. They’ll be using our trailer since it has bunks for the kids. This means we are taking the trailer up to the campground on Sunday and picking it up on Thursday. Friday we leave for our Labor Day weekend camping trip at Pine Hollow. We get back on Monday and the kids start school on Wednesday. I hate that summers always seem to go by so quickly. I am looking forward to getting back into our school/fall routine.
I heard from the clinic in the last week. They emailed me info to log into the patient portal and fill out some forms. That person said my clinic coordinator would be contacting me to set up an intake call. I got an email from the supporting coordinator to schedule the call and we set it up for next Wednesday the 14th at 3pm.
Before I had heard from the clinic, I sent our agency case manager an email asking if she knew if we needed a new psych eval or if they could use the previous one. She said she would check with the clinic and see what they said. She also said that when she spoke with IFs they mentioned we were waiting until the end of the year to transfer and asked if that was still the case. Um, yes, it’s been the case since we started getting things ready? We were very up front with everyone about it, but it seems that info didn’t get passed along, oh well
Once the clinic had emailed me (they included the agency CM on the email so she was kept in the loop) our CM emailed back asking about when we should do the medical screening if we’re not transferring until after Christmas as sometimes the tests they do are only good for so long. She also asked about the psych eval. The clinic emailed back and said that they would only ask for a new eval if I had some major life event happen since last time (divorce, death in the family). Since we haven’t had anything like that happen we shouldn’t need a new one (yay!! One less thing to do). They also said that the uterine evaluation they do is only good for 6 months so they suggested waiting until Sept or Oct to do the med screening.
It’s a bummer we won’t be able to cross it off the list sooner and now we’ll just be in a holding pattern until then, but it’s probably best to do it that way. I don’t think I’d want to push it too far into Oct just because my lawyer can be slow. So if we factor in that, plus 6 weeks of meds before transfer we may be cutting it a little close. I told our agency CM that I was good with whatever IFs decided to do. I’ll be ready to do the med screening whenever they feel is the best timing.
So now we wait…which is a huge part of surrogacy LOL we’re going to be busy the next couples months so the waiting shouldn’t seem too long. I may take a break from weekly updates if there isn’t anything going on, but we shall see 🙂
I think I mentioned last week that I was probably going to email the recruitment team at the agency just to see what was going on. I did that in the late morning and almost immediately got a response that said they had a meeting coming up shortly and she should have an update for me after that. Three minutes later I had an email addressed to a bunch of people at the agency as well as IFs introducing us to our new case manager. Unfortunately we weren’t able to have the same CM as last time because she has a full case load already 😕 This new CM seems very nice and has been a GC twice before.
That all happened on Wednesday. On Friday I got an email from the new CM introducing herself and asking if we could set up a Zoom meeting. She offered up some days and times, none of which I could make work. I emailed her back and asked if we absolutely needed to to the Zoom. I let her know that my work schedule this summer is must more rigid that it usually is because we have someone out on maternity leave until mid/late Sept. I told her my work hours and asked if she was okay just forgoing the Zoom meeting as it’s my 3rd time with CFC and I was totally fine with just an email. She came back and said that was fine and asked some questions which I answered right back.
She told me in her first email that she would be reaching out to the clinic to let them know that we’re ready to start medical clearance for a sibling surrogacy. She said they would be getting in touch with me once they complete their administrative steps so I’m just waiting on them now. I’m hoping that they don’t take forever and we can start working on getting things scheduled. I haven’t heard anything about when/if we need to do the psych evaluations, it would be great if our last ones were still good, but I think I’ve heard that they are only good for 2 years. I’m sure we will find out!
It’s nice to finally have taken a small step forward! I messaged IFs and told them I had given CFC a little kick in pants to try and move things along a little bit. They said that they had started to draft an email to them as well, but then decided to give them a little more time. They were happy I went ahead and asked what was going on lol While we all know we’re not transferring for another 6ish months, we still all eager to have things move forward because really, it will be here before we know it!
In other news….it’s been crazy hot in the Pacific Northwest. We had record breaking temps for days in a row. Not just daily record breaking, but all time record breaking and it’s still only June! Yesterday was our hottest day at 111*F (44*C) Today it’s supposed to be cooler at 102*F (39*C) which is still stupid warm for here this time of year. Our average high this time of year is 77*F (25*C) so it being this hot this early in the summer is pretty concerning as we live in an area very prone to wildfires. The humidity has also been very low at about 14% during the day. The heat isn’t going away anytime soon either. While we do drop out of the 100s, they are forecasting we stay at or above 90*F (32*C) for the next 14 days. Our forecast changes daily in the High Desert so hopefully that changes and temps get lower. I’m sure a lot of people in the southern US, especially the SW are probably like “that’s not even that bad, our whole summer is that hot.” LOL Problem here is A LOT of people don’t have A/C in their homes because we don’t typically need it. I’ve never had central air in any of the houses I’ve lived in. Most older homes just don’t have it. We have two portable A/C units which makes us luckier than a lot of people, but even with that the house gets up to 84-84*F (28-29*C) during the day. The kids’ bedrooms are like saunas and it has been a real struggle to cool them off enough for the kids to sleep in there. We are lucky here in Bend that our overnight temperatures are relatively low. In the Portland area where most of our family lives it wasn’t getting below 80*F (26*C) at night. That makes it even harder to cool off your house enough to keep it a reasonable temperature the next day.
We are headed out for our first camping trip of the year tomorrow afternoon. Usually we’ve already been camping twice by this time of the year, but it didn’t work out that way this year so we are all very eager to go. We’ll be at a lake that I used to camp at every year as a kid. It’s my daughter’s favorite lake and tomorrow is her 6th birthday so she’s extra excited for tomorrow. It will be nice to at least be able to escape to the water when the temps start climbing.
So there we are…the first real update in weeks 😁 I doubt I will have anything new by next Wednesday with the holiday weekend this weekend, but hopefully by the next week I will have an idea when I will be going to the clinic for med clearance.
I had to check any make sure it really is Wednesday after I typed the title…the summer days are really starting to blur together already 😆
This is another week I don’t have much of an update on the sibling journey front. I emailed with our previous case manager to see what the hold up was. Being the awesome, helpful person she is, she asked around. She said that they were trying to figure out what case manager to put us with because she is full with cases. She said she would take us back in a heartbeat, but she doesn’t get to make the decisions. So apparently that’s the hold up. I think I might email the recruiting team again and see if I can push them along a little bit. I know we’re on a slower timeline so our stuff doesn’t take precedence, but we have a really busy summer schedule so scheduling things like psych evals and medical screening appointments might be tricky. I would rather be able to start getting things on the books before our schedule fills up more (we are always super busy in the summer. I feel like we are trying to make up for it being too cold to do much for so many months of the year. Now that the kids are in school our summers are even shorter which means busier).
In other news, school is out for the summer which the kiddos are thrilled about. We have grandparents and cousins coming this next weekend. Then the weekend after that we’re camping for the 4th of July/Liv’s birthday. It’s going to be a busy couple weeks before a slight break.
My sweet sweet first IFs sent us goodies last week! The note said they have been thinking about us and thought they would send some treats 🥰 We talk via WhatsApp every so often. They always send pictures and videos of surro babe #1. She’s growing so fast! I can’t believe she’ll be 3 in September 😊 She has so much family around to love on her, and she seems to be soaking it all up with a smile on her face!
That’s where we’re at as of right now. Nothing going on, just more of the waiting game. I will say that I am being way more patient than in times past because we’ve got some time before we want to transfer. Hopefully by the time the end of the year starts closing in we already have everything taken care of.
This should be a short and sweet post because I have absolutely no update 😅
Still waiting to hear what the next step is. I don’t think we’ve been handed back over to our coordinator yet. I think we’re still with the recruitment/intake team as far as I know.
Yesterday we celebrated our son’s 8th birthday 🎂🎂 He was so happy it was finally his birthday. We don’t do big birthdays and usually we take them to Great Wolf Lodge instead of a party. We didn’t get to go last year because of COVID and this year we’ve had to push it out to October. I wrote “Happy Birthday Wyatt” on the car window before I went and picked him up at school which he thought was so cool lol Then we went to the store to pick out a cake. He got to choose what he wanted for dinner (bow tie pasta with alfredo). He wanted to take a “nice hot bath to relax.” After he got to open presents and have cake. He shares a birthday with my dad so we did a video chat where they sang Wyatt Happy Birthday, then we sang it to grandpa 😄 All in all I think he had a good day and was happy to be able to say he’s 8 now.
I’ll be back next week with hopefully some type of update!
Today surro babe #2 is a whole year old! It’s funny how it can seem like yesterday and years ago at the same time.
She is getting so big and seems to be just a joy for her dads. We keep in touch regularly, especially since we’re working on a sibling for her! I get to see pictures of their adventures and hear all about what they’ve been up to.
I got an email this morning saying that the clinic gave me their pre-approval. The agency contact said that once IFs have all their “ducks in a row” we will switch to our coordinator. I would imagine that it will be soon since IFs are always on the ball so once the agency tells them what they need I’m sure they’ll figure it out soon.
For some reason…and there truly is no rhyme or reason to this guess, but I feel like their last embryo is a boy. I think that just stems from the thought that it would be cool to carry another boy to bookend the 3 girls between my son and what I’m almost positive will be my last pregnancy. I’m really keeping my fingers crossed that the transfer goes well and their little one decides to stick around. It would be a great way to end this chapter of my life (the carrying and delivering babies chapter that is).
We will have to wait and see what this adventure has in store for us! Until then…a very very happy 1st birthday to surro babe #2!